Bangers And Mash Songtext - Peter Sellers

Bangers And Mash - Peter Sellers

Him:

I met 'er down in Napoli and didn't she look great
And so I brought 'er back to Blighty just to show me mates
And though we're married 'appily, I'll tell ya furthermore
I 'aven't 'ad a decent meal since Nineteen-Forty-Four!


Her:

Eat your minestrone, Joe!

Him:

That's all you ever say!

Her:

Eat your macaroni, Joe!

Him:

Ev'ry blinkin' day!

Her:

No wonder you're so boney, Joe
And skinny as a rake!

Him:

Well then, give us a bash at the bangers and mash me muvver used to make!


Him:

Bangers and mash

Her:

Minestrone

Him:

Bangers and mash

Her:

Macaroni

Him:

Give us a bash at the bangers and mash me muvver used to make!


Her:

Eat your tagliatelli, Joe!

Him:

That's all I've 'eard for years!

Her:

Eat your vermicelli, Joe!

Him:

It's comin' out me ears!

Her:

You've got to fill your belly, Joe!
Joe, for heaven's sake!

Him:

Well then, give us a bash at the bangers and mash me muvver used to make!

Her:

Well, alright!


Him:

Bangers and mash

Her:

Tagliatelli

Him:

Bangers and mash

Her:

Vermicelli

Him:

Ah, give us a bash at the bangers and mash me muvver used to make!



(Spoken. All voices by Sellers):



American reporter
:

Nineteen-Forty-Three, Allied Forces land in Italy!


1st soldier:


There's a smashin'-lookin' bird over there, Bert. I think she's showin' out there.


2nd soldier:


Well, why don't you chat 'er up then?


1st soldier:


Right! Bongourno Signorina now. 'Ere, are you married?


Italian Girl:


(Unintellible reply)


1st soldier:


There y'are. Can't 'ave a fairer answer than that, can ya!



Her:

I met him back in Italy, so dashing and good-looking
He wined me and he dined me ev'ry night
He said I smiled so prettily and how he loved my cooking
But since he's married me, it seems he's lost his appetite


Him
(Italian accent)
:

Eat your tagliatelli, Joe!

Her
(Cockney accent)
:

That's all you ever say! Ooohhhhh!

Him:

Eat your vermicelli, Joe!

Her:

Ev'ry bloomin' day!

Him:

You've a-got to fill your belly, Joe!
Joe, for heaven's sake!

Her:

Well then, give us a bash at the bangers and mash your muvver used to make!


Him:

Bangers and mash

Her:

Minestrone

Him:

Bangers and mash

Her:

Macaroni

Him:

Give me a bash with the bangers and mash!

Her:


(Laughing)


Him:

Like the same one what your mother was!

Her:


(Laughing)


Him:

What you laughing at now?

Her:


(Laughing)


Him:


(Indistinct)

. . . . . Please!

- - - -


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