Dear John
Quelle: Spotify
It all occurred at 3 am in the morning in a place Where the affluent are warned to stay away from.
A place better known as the infamous Tenderloin of San Francisco.
However, I will not disclose the name of the hotel for fear of possible judicial repercussions.
It was a place I frequented often for the very purpose of feeding the gorilla that was on my back.
Racing home to minimize the wrath of my wife resulted in red lights flashing in my rear view mirror, hell I thought it was the special effects of the drugs.
But only after I heard a speaker admonishing me to pull over I knew that I was in a world of trouble.
I was told that I had a right to remain silent, that anything I say would and could be held against me in a court of law.
Sitting in my cell for a month I finally received a letter in which we call in jail medication because it really does ease the pain of loneliness.
It said Dear John our prayers have finally been answered because you just got caught.
I hope that when this letter reaches you it finds that you all stressed out.
Today a courier will deliver you paperwork of our pending divorce.
Any questions you have regarding this issue you may address unto your public defender when you get to court.
You see John I married you because at the time I was doing real bad.
Now I am about to become the recipient of everything that you ever had.
John since you've been gone everything has been alright,
I've been eating steaks every day and making love four times a night.
My new boyfriend makes love much longer than you do, actually an hour and a half compared to the four minutes that you do.
I'm writing you in hopes John that this letter actually gives you a fit.
But personally to see how much time your punk ass would get.
PS I would have sent you 10 dollars but I had already sealed the envelope.
I feel so bad this evening,
I feel like shooting me some gasoline,
Ohhhh
I said I feel real, real bad this evening,
Ah people I feel like shooting some gasoline,
standing over a lit stove,
let my body blow a whole lot of steam
Oh Lord...
I wish my mom had stayed a virgin,
Ah people I wouldn't be in the shape that I'm in
Oh Lord
I wish mom had stayed a virgin
I wouldn't be in the shape that I'm in
No Lord
I wish I could become a fly on my ex-wife's wall,
I commit me a, a major sin...
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